Is Bluey making our job even harder?
Life lessons told in an unpatronising way has liberated screen time for many, but is Bluey upholding a level of parenting which we will find impossible to meet?
Bluey has been an overwhelming hit all over the world. With the rest of season three about to hit Disney + many parents are looking forward to watching the Australian Heeler family get up to even more fun adventures, but while the success of Bluey is indisputable, is it actually making parenting even harder for us?
In a world of television where brats like Peppa Pig and Bing dominate - Bluey is a breath of fresh air. Bluey is a lovely 6 year old girl. She’s a dog but she represents a nice child from a nice family. She plays with her younger sister, Bingo and she is popular at school. Her days are filled with endless make-believe games and doses of cheekiness, which are planted to entertain the parents as well as the children. It’s one of those shows that appeals to everyone - like The Simpsons but more child friendly.
In their adventures there is often a meaning or life lesson that is discovered often covering bigger life questions and more adult themes.
When I first saw “Baby Race” for example, I felt it was the first time a children’s cartoon had seen me, a self-doubting mother, and represented me on screen. Chilli, Bluey’s mum, tells the story of when Bluey was a baby and was learning to walk. She rolled over early, but struggled to keep up with the more advanced baby in the baby group, her neighbour Judo - Chilli thought she was doing something wrong. Another Mum, Coco’s mum, comes to see Chilli after noticing her absence from the mother and baby group and tells her that she is “doing great.” I have watched this episode countless times and every time she says it I tear up as much as Chilli does. It really isn’t what you would expect from a children’s tv show.
Similarly there is an episode where Chilli completely loses her patience and bursts into a mum rage - which is fairly representative of my everyday. When Bandit (Bluey’s Dad) comes home from getting his haircut she demands twenty minutes to be left alone explaining “Mum just needs twenty minutes.” It is something I like to say to explain my overstimulation in the evenings and I have learned that my feelings are very common and by taking a step back I can deal with the situation better.
In many ways, Bluey has served as a handy guidebook for new parents and parents of young children showing how the parents deal with some challenges in a funny way but also at the same time creating an expectation of what the reality is. The biggest realisation here is that Muffin, their younger cousin who has a fair few tantrums, is actually developmentally a normal three year old - something I have to remind myself daily when my son is screaming at me.
I have also been grateful to Bluey for the inspiration the episodes have given my son to play games that involve his imagination and it really is lovely to watch. He regularly plays, “Library”, “Fancy Restaurant”, “Trains”, “Bus” and “Grannies” but when he calls out to myself or my partner to play with him my heart sinks. Again? Really?
There are many episodes where Bluey’s parents are shown to have flawed and shown to not want to play - but they are less often than when the parents get heavily involved. Their flaws make them relatable to us, but I am not sure my toddler is seeing these and when they are more often than not shown to be immersed in the children’s games, are they actually screwing us over?
I am not always in the mood for these games, often I am keen to do something else and I don’t think my toddler understands this. I feel pitted against Bandit and Chilli when they are in the mood and I come across like a terrible Mum.
Whilst I was initially overjoyed that the horrors of screen time had suddenly been lessened by the great story writing in episodes of Bluey - every adventure has a life lesson and the way it is told is far from patronising, I fear now that when they are shown to be their best selves, they are making the rest of us look bad - because even though they are flawed, and there are moments they don’t want to play - they are largely outweighed by those when they more than comply.
Many of us could probably relate to Chloe’s dad in “Octopus” - how he is almost challenged to play as well as Bluey’s dad in a game where the children have to get past a crazed octopus. He is seen to be a little wooden when it comes to imaginative play and it’s exactly how I feel - but in the end he does succeed to play in his own way.
The other challenge of Bluey is the exposure to the children’s cheekiness is contagious. The characters are nice children, but they do challenge their parents and say some things which, whilst are funny on television, may not be funny in reality. Toddlers are like sponges and absorb everything that is said around them, so it is no surprise that my son has started to pick up little phrases that Bluey says. I burst into laughter once when my son called his dad “Big Fella”, I couldn’t help it.
On the other hand Bandit’s substitute phrases “Biscuits” and “Cheese and Jam” are great inspiration for anyone looking for something to lessen the swearing that comes out of their mouths. I am not sure it has worked for me, but I am trying.
So is Bluey the best thing on children’s television?
I’d say even when I feel completely lesser than the two super parents that are Bandit and Chilli and their ability to absorb themselves in children’s play and ignore the rest of the demands of parenting, I still think it’s better than the other shows available. Whilst I don’t want to launch a tirade on Peppa Pig and Bing, I do think they are truly terrible and I can’t bear to watch them. But it is more than the best of a bad bunch. It has been an invaluable source of inspiration and a valuable guide in our parenting journey. It is really good and if you haven’t introduced it to your kids yet, I recommend it - my day is always brightened by my son asking if he can watch Library Bluey again.
'Baby Race' had me bawling my eyes out. And the one where Chilli's sister was struggling to conceive. Both had me in pieces, I've been both women. It is incredible that a kids show speaks to parents in such a profound way. I get where you're coming from about Chili and Bandit though - they always seem up for playing! Not really realistic! I wish there were more shows of this quality out there.